PHANTASMAGORIA
by - Joyce
March 1999

DISCLAIMER: I've used characters from the X-Files without permission. No infringement is intended.
NOTES: It would help to have seen "Two Fathers," "One Son," and "Agua Mala."
SUMMARY: Mulder calls Scully to talk over a nightmare.
FEEDBACK:  mab49@earthlink.net
 

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"Hey, Scully."

"Mulder, do you know what time it is?"

"Don’t you?"

"It's 3:30 in the morning."

"You don't sound asleep."

"I'm a really good actress. What do you want?"

"Why weren't you asleep?"

"You called to ask me that?"

"Of course not. Do you?"

"Do I what?"

"Call people to see if they're asleep."

"Mulder, get to the point."

"Oh yeah. Well, I had this really weird dream."

"You're calling me at 3:30 in the morning because you had a dream?"

"It was a *really* weird bad B-movie type dream, Scully. We were trapped in this house during a hurricane with some sort of sea creature coming up out of the drains."

"Did you have sushi for dinner again?"

"No, I didn't. Anyway, this creature killed by injecting its eggs into a human body and dissolving it. One guy actually went down the drain."

"Impossible, Mulder."

"That's what you kept saying."

"Then you should listen to me."

"Yeah, well, you'll love this next part."

"Why do I have a feeling I won't."

"I got infected and you let a guy with a gun intimidate you, so you decided to take up obstetrics instead of helping me."

"Are you on drugs?"

"Not even an aspirin."

"Sure, Mulder, and you're forgetting the part where I deliver the baby, solve the case, and rescue you single-handedly."

"That wasn't part of the dream."

"Well it should have been. Don't blame me for how you edit your dreams."

"Yeah, right. Are you still mad at me?"

"I forget. Am I supposed to be?"

"Only if you want. If you're not mad, I'll tell you a secret."

"Do I really want to know this?"

"You're beautiful when you're mad."

"Flatterer. Considering how often I'm mad at you, it's probably a good thing."

"You haven't taken up voodoo have you?"

"Not that I can recall - why? You seeing zombies now?"

"I feel like somebody's sticking pins in me."

"Probably just the cracks in your leather couch."

"Very funny. I have a very nice waterbed now, thank you very much."

"I know."

"I know you know."

"I can't shake the feeling that this dream really happened."

"Don't be ridiculous, Mulder. I don't care how pissed off at you I get, I would never leave you alone to die."

"Thank you."

"The paperwork would take weeks to fill out."

"That's reassuring."

"Seriously, Mulder. We've had these disagreements before. You get mad. I get mad. We take up hard-line positions then work our way to middle ground."

"You just sounded so final."

"I was mad and I was afraid. How do you manage to make next-to-nothing evidence sound so convincing?"

"Practice. Lots and lots of practice. By the way, Frohike says he'll be by to pick up his payment tomorrow night. What on earth did you bribe the guys with, Scully?"

"Not a thing. They were as concerned as I was."

"Sure."

"She's dirty, you know."

"Probably, but allow me a little dignity here. I'm batting zero for two. What are the odds that I'll do any better the third time at bat?"

"I hadn't thought about that."

"I have and it doesn't look promising."

"You giving up?"

"Not a chance. Did that once already and I felt like shit."

"Neither am I. You're stuck with me, buster."

"Glad to hear it. I was afraid you were going to trade me in on a new, sportier model."

"No way. I'm not spending another five years breaking in a new partner. You're too much fun to argue with. Besides, you challenge me, you make me think, and I've gotten used to being the cowboy who rides to your rescue. I'm not turning over that job to some wet-behind-the-ears rookie."

"Hey, partner, next time, can one of us manage to need rescuing in the Bahamas? This cold and ice routine is getting old, very fast."

"Don't complain. With our luck, it would be the Sahara."

"Right. Thanks."

"No problem."

"Goodnight, Scully."

"Goodnight, Mulder."

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Author's Note:  This is my attempt to explain Scully's inexplicable behavior in Agua Mala.

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